


Freedom

by LordofLezzies



Series: How Derek Found Out [4]
Category: Grey's Anatomy
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-29
Updated: 2016-12-29
Packaged: 2018-09-13 00:57:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,222
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9098488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LordofLezzies/pseuds/LordofLezzies
Summary: Derek's POV. Takes place in 2x25 after Addison asks Meredith if she's been sleeping with Derek





	

I was looking for Addison, someone told me that she was in the conference room, and the sight that greeted me when I opened the door to said conference room was one that I could have never prepared for. Mark would have thought it was hot, but I wasn't Mark. To me it was a hideous betrayal. The sight was erotic yes, but not hot, definitely not hot. I closed the door behind me, but they didn't notice. My wife sat on the conference room table, legs parted, her skirt bunched up at her hips, and one Meredith Grey positioned between her legs. The woman I loved and the woman I felt obligated to love, it hurt, but I couldn't look away. Addison was completely composed her lab coat was still on her blouse still buttoned, the only thing missing were her panties. My wife's head was thrown back in pleasure, her eyes were closed and fingers with perfectly manicured nails were tangled in blonde locks. It played like a silent film that I could only stand in horror and watch. I was angry as I watched Meredith bring Addison to orgasm with her mouth. My wife was one to scream in ecstasy as she climaxed, but now she only whimpered before bringing Meredith's lips to hers. I watched as Addison smiled the most brilliant smile the moment their lips parted. They looked so comfortable together as if they'd done this before, but as I looked on, I knew that they hadn't, this had been spontaneous, it had just happened.

Addison told Meredith that she set her free. "I feel like I'm floating, it's perfect." I watched as their lips locked again. "It's so wrong that this feels so right, you feel so right," She whispered before capturing the blonde's lips once again. I watched as she tugged gently at Meredith's lower lip, still completely oblivious to my presence. It was like those mirrors in interrogation rooms I could see them, but they couldn't see me. "I can't believe we did that." I was right it had definitely been the first time. It didn't matter if they had done this a thousand times before, or if it was the first time, all that mattered was the blood I felt rushing through my body angrily, I could stand there in silence no longer.

"Once an adulterous bitch always an adulterous bitch, destroying my relationship with Mark wasn't enough for you Addison?" I growled as they finally recognized my presence. "And you," I breathed as my eyes locked with Meredith's, "Couldn't just fuck Karev? You are a whore." They said nothing in response to my harsh words. They had a wordless conversation while I stared on angrily. How could they do this to me? Meredith then asked Addison, if she wanted her to grab something and Addison had responded with a soft "yes" and they straightened themselves out quickly. Despite the situation they weren't exactly disheveled, they were actually quite presentable, it was as if they'd just been having a perfectly calm discussion about a case they were working.

As Meredith made to leave the conference room, she leaned in close to me and whispered coldly, "Your relationship with me was ruined beyond repair when you called me a whore." She went and retrieved the divorce papers Addison had left signed in her office, and when she returned with them I was more than happy to sign them.

"Do you have anything to say for yourself?" I asked as I handed the papers to my soon to be ex-wife.

"I'm free," She exhaled happily. I repeated the word in the form of a question, surprised that, that was all she had to say for herself. "I'm not going to be trapped in a loveless marriage anymore, I won't have to watch you look at her and wish that you would look at me that way. These past few months," She began, searching for the right words. "You choosing me has felt like a punishment, you don't even want me, you didn't when you made the choice to stay with me. This marriage is like a prison, and now I'm free." I heard the pain in her voice, and I didn't feel so angry anymore, I couldn't be angry anymore, I felt ashamed. I had been punishing her for what happened with Mark, I'd been indifferent and absent and everything she accused me of being before Mark. She wasn't going to give me the satisfaction of seeing her cry, but I could tell she wanted to. Maybe she'd cried on Meredith. I'd hurt Meredith too. I told her she wasn't the girl I screwed to get over being screwed, and she wasn't but when I chose to stay with Addison, when I'd called her a whore for dating the Vet, I treated her like that girl.

Addison had told me multiple times that I had ignored her, but I always thought that was a flimsy excuse for cheating, but it wasn't an excuse, it was the truth. "I am sorry about Mark, it didn't just happen, he is a whore, but he made me feel wanted when you couldn't bother. And you fucked things up with Meredith yourself. I may very well be an adulterous bitch, but I am not the one pretending that I have no blame in the end of my marriage." I couldn't believe that it took me so long to realize that I was in fact partially responsible for the ending of our marriage. I told her that I was, that I understood, but I didn't really believe the words when I'd said them to her, I did now. I was vaguely aware of her telling me that she was getting Meredith in the divorce.

I had seen Addison at her best and worst, I'd walked in on her committing adultery twice, but I had never seen her like this, it was as if I was really seeing her now for the first time. She had told me I'd been absent, I'd admitted to it, saw that it was true, tried to take blame for our marriage falling apart, but now I finally saw what she'd been trying to tell me. She had wanted my attention, wanted me to care about her again, and I'd run away, and found someone new to care about. And now, I was only mad because it was Meredith, Meredith who I had treated so poorly even when I knew I wanted her, knew I loved her. This time she got my attention. I hadn't hurt Addison because I was trying to, I'd hurt her because I wasn't trying at all. That confident exterior hid an insecure woman, a woman I had made insecure through my neglect. She wasn't making excuses for her behavior she was telling me the truth. Addison wasn't one to make excuses she took responsibility for her actions, and it was time that I took responsibility for mine.

"I didn't see it before, I said that I did, but I didn't, and now I do. I'm sorry Addison, I'm sorry that it came to this, and I'm sorry that we hurt each other."

"I'm sorry too Derek," She whispered. Our lips brushed together gently and I knew it was a kiss goodbye.


End file.
